So how gross is it that Woopie Goldberg has a vagina? She's like the exact opposite of a boner....
I have this strange craving to see a really fat person go down a slipnslide
Just got a full body massage. It was uncomfortable at first, but then I realized I let strangers turn off the lights and put their hands all over my naked body 3 times a week anyways.
your brother is wearing shin guards in the swimming pool. i have a feeling that this happens often
this is getting really bad. i thought the chandelier in the dining room was one of those claws from the claw games in an arcade and i spent the past five minutes jumping left to right so the claw wouldn't grab me
Drank a fosters this weekend and last weekend. Listening to down under 5 times a day. Spent 100 dollars on a sleeveless men at work shirt circa 1983. We don't leave for another 5 weeks. I call it pregaming.
I was at that stage of drunk where it seemed appropriate to just make out with everyone. As like a greeting.
I hear you
If you come home soon there's a stripper in the shower. Don't be alarmed
U know when u get really drunk and u don't think anyone can see what your doing? If I'm that drunk the possibilities are endless
The only people in the library at 5:00 on the friday after finals are homeless or pre-med.
You should be able to leave recommendations on Tinder.
apparently I kept repeating I have a to do list this summer and he's on it
Never drinking before a 6am train again. Just threw up at boarder control and had to pretend it was cause I was pregnant and not cause I trashed.
You make Europe seem so glamorous.
Did April legit get married in a parking lot?
My hairdresser won’t do keratin treatments because of the toxins, but will put ecstasy up her butt at festivals...
Randomize
