Brandy, I need a picture of your boobs. Not time to explain.
Theyre still fighting about whether its called america or the united states.
He keeps apologizing for not being able to get hard when he's drunk. We havent even left the club yet.
You better have your party panties on Saturday!
Why only Saturday?
Well I have an AA meeting Sat morning so I'm going to try to take it easy Fri.
In a world where you don't want your phone to pocket dial your parents at 2 in the morning while you're running around Florida shitfaced, Droid does.
Because its an amazing idea and you're the only one I can think of that will allow a pirate threesome
Is it some european holiday today? We both woke up to find loaves of bread in our rooms...
If we laid all the dicks that's have been inside of us end to end it would be as tall as 4 story building. 40 feet of dicks.
tanning, a slurpee, and a cigarette. spa day college edition
The best part of the night was you shouting "I have to take the LSAT tomorrow" between shots of fireball.
I was intimate with him for twenty minutes and will be intimate with shame for twenty years.
For a guy who came before his dick was out of his pants, he gave surprisingly good head.
And all i could do was bury the part of me that felt guilty for cradle robbing and put on my dick swallowing bib.
Still riding the magical train of drugs so, yeah, Id say I feel great
I’m photoshopping my boobs to up my Tinder game. I need better dick in 2020
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