What are you drinking?
Shitty Coors light. OM NOM NOM TASTES LIKE HIGH SCHOOL
You threw up. And every time you flushed you would wave and go "Bye Bye!" and then when the new water came you would greet it with "Helloooo!"
im pretty sure all they do is fuck. and talk in baby talk. its two babys fucking basically.
i wont go near him until the smell goes away , and he takes the chex mix box off his head.
im not sure. I kicked him in the ear last night trying to kick a plastic cup off his head to prove I can kick higher than anyone.
All I know is she walked in crying with a bag of limes and a bottle of tequila and has been locked in her room blasting lil wayne ever since.
It looked like his dick was wearing an argyle sweater.
most desperate stoner moment might have been when we filled the bong up with pond water
desperate times, desperate measures
Send me another check for the tickets. I scratched out "anal wax" and now the bank won't take it.
Thanks for being my pregnancy scare Sherpa...
The highlight of the night was definitely when you starting telling ppl you could shapeshift and "proved" that by stripping.
I ended up sleeping on a park bench. Never using Tinder again.
He managed to rip my nipple last night....
I threw my back out having sex last night. I don’t know whether to high five myself for a job well done or cry because I’m old.
I am really drunk and also a zombie.
Randomize
