Apparently you make a good broom.
So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
The chick I went home with last night had a happy trail
is it wrong that I want a "Where The Wild Things Are" tshirt that points to my junk?
its hard to take this fight seriously when one dude is an oompa loompa, and the other is a "g spot"
I don't believe u have enough text space to describe the dimensions of his penis.
What can I say? I like my food like I like my women, not entirely fucked by our contemporary world.
Sitting on the curb by new england comics with a weeping drunk girl who's eating french fries saying she'll never be as successful as her sister the hand model. She's scaring the nerds.
I got a second ticket last night for drunkly using my one call to order a pizza and get it delivered at the police station
I get so many dick pics from him...He has an unhealthy obsession with his own penis...
I shaved an Xmas tree into my junk.... I placed your present underneath.
Riddle me this: How does one check in at the Marriott, but wake up at the W?
Dude 4th of July week was our like 5th anniversary of you sending me dick pics ❤️
Btw I thought it was impossible to use up 48 bottles of patron in one night but I was wrong...
He had a tattoo of a crown above his penis. He was AMAZING! It was well deserved. LONG LIVE THE KING!
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