Remember that sex scene from American Psycho?
Ya, why?
We should try that some time.
Next weekend I am getting a library card and staying my whore ass home.
how many americans can say they have been laid before eating their first big mac?
Russians do not operate on the same level as the rest of us. hoping I wake up tomorrow
You have dresses for different occasions. I need different men's dicks too. It's logic.
I just wanna go somewhere and not be judged for wearing spandex shorts that make my ass look like a slice of fucking heaven. Is that so much to ask??
my friend thinks you're hot & wants to fuck you ps i'm my friend
I was having the most awesome dream about onion rings and you hit me and told me to stop touching you...WTF?
are you just inviting me because you can't afford an actual stripper?
Dude, you kicked in the door to get to a six-person orgy while yelling "I JUST WANT TO LEARN!!"
I'M CUDDLING WITH MY CAT AND THAT GUY SENT ME A DICK PIC. UNANNOUNCED DICK PICS ARE TERRIFYING AND MY CAT WILL NEVER BE THE SAME
It's hard to talk dirty with a mouth full of peanut butter
So I just saw someone get shoved into a car trunk by your car.
Can't we just go back to fucking and having your boyfriend think you're completely straight?
Who put the toilet in the living room? This is extremely inconvenient right now.
Randomize
