Why did you send me a picture of a dick?
It was an accident sry. Not mine tho.
drinking warm bud heavies i found in the garage and googling how to tell the gosselin kids apart.
Bro, i just sang journey's "dont stop beleavin" at mcdonalds. and the guy was sooo impressed he gave us free food. God i love america
We had to leave the bar because you were trying to show the bartender your boobs for water.
Yeah he doesn't get it. We had to change the subject to Keanu reeves before someone got hurt.
i had to sit with a fan pointed directly to my vag for a good 10 minutes
Like "oh its Monday, gotta get wasted today!" not "oh its Monday.. Gotta go to class"
Ugh I can't even look at alcohol this weekend, my body needs to heal.
My head feels like Jesus is projectile vomiting hammers on it
I hate to stick you with the friend but I did all the work.
i have never been so sexually frustrated as I am right now. I feel like dying...is death an option?
New fuck buddy and long time fuck buddy are carpooling home for thanksgiving. #10hrconvoaboutmyblowjobskills
Don't masturbate while listening to Pandora. Just came during a buffalo wild wings commercial and I feel really weird about it.
He sent me a snap of him eating a tamale shirtless. I think I might be in love.
LOCK HIM DOWN.
Bro.. I am absolutely going to have sex with our old middle school health teacher
Randomize
