Should I be offended if he asked if he could use saran wrap to eat me out?
I hate this i feel like im wasting my youth here. I should be off hooking up with boys around the world and having awkward next morning convos in different languages!!
we were having sex in the bathroom when his aunt knocked on the door
and rather than go out and meet her, i climbed out the window. so now she thinks he was masturbating and moaning his own name in a really girly voice
Her gag reflex was as absent as a father figure must have been in her childhood
I found a knife in my bed when I got back this morning. I think one of my roommates has it in for me
I have the Lakers game on, but all I can think about is having sex with you. Not sure what you've done here.
Just threw up in the garbage can outside the liquor store... I'm pretty sure that's some sort of distress signal.
my stepmom is let-the-dog-eat-out-of-her-mouth drunk. oh my god.
It's a self-perpetuating puke chain.
Last I saw him was around 10 this morning. He was passed out on the porch with his head under the barbeque cover and there were cups of orange juice around him as well as loose tobacco spread everywhere. Good luck getting a hold of him.
I have a theory he's part Neanderthal
Just for future reference, me asking if you're free, followed by a winking face is not my way of suggesting a tandem bike ride.
All I've succeeded in doing since I saw you is drool on my shoulder
He's the only guy without a tacky accent I've seen in this southern dump in 6 months. Bangage was inevitable.
You're such a Yankee.
Walking towards a police car with full spotlights on you while being fully erect..awkward exp. for both parties
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