I feel bad for the person that has to clean the dishes that I peed on last night.
instead of telling him i dont hook up with closet frat guys, i gave him his "straight' fraternity brothers number... pike house will be interesting tonight
She had a group on her phone called "great fucks". I was in it. It's almost like making the forbes list
Dude i'm seriously thinking about his nipples.
Midnight run for medical supplies ended several hours later with a lapdance to the Braveheart soundtrack.
The underwear in the garbage is clean. Just wipe the pizza sauce off
It was like stroking your vagina with a cloud.
Bad breakup?
He posted a pic of me fully naked and smiling as he inserted a carrot into my vagina as my FB profile pic and then changed the PW, locking me out of my own account. So 500 of my closest friends, family, and coworkers now have that mental image of me on FB.
REALLY should have cleaned under my bed before I had my parents come help me pack...things my parents just found: several condoms and a bottle of lube. My mom when she found a condom: "ooo ribbed. Laura's a lucky girl"
He sent me a 2am email the just said "Ping". Nerdiest booty call ever.
I'm pathetic. I'm eating cream puffs in the bath and crying a little.
Ate 3 ghost peppers and chased them with Everclear last night. Currently on the toilet cursing the universe and everyone in it.
I came and sneezed at the same time. Words can't describe how awesome it was.
I think I fell in love last night
That guy had a face tattoo and was named Cheddar. Please tell me you’re kidding.
On the good side I got hit on by a cute college guy. But the bad side was having sex in a frat house for first time in 9 years
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