Is it sad that I'm on the stopduiaz.com website and there is a cute boy but it will never work between us because hes in jail for 17.5 years?
Um.. is it mean if I say yes?
How would my first penpal letter even go? "Hey saw you on stopduiaz.com, sucks you killed that motorcyclist. Whats your favorite thing to do on the weekend?"
Girl passed out in class and vomited. Another victim of syllabus week
I keep reminding myself that my vagina isn't a homeless shelter.
It says a lot about how well I know you when I can understand messages of yours that say things like "sauteed Jesus."
I think my sister is getting tired of me breaking into her house so I can sleep with random girls when shes not there
A girl pulled up next to me at a stoplight just now, looked around for a second, and then changed her top, bra and all, before the light turned green. New. Hero.
So a sorority girl just introduced herself to me by saying "a guy I used to fuck just threw up on me" and then she grinded on me
So in Aca Taco on grad night 1am, this bitch walks in alone drunk as fuck in her gown to the front of the line and says, "I graduated today...thank YOU"
For months it was all good and well just having sex. Now, something in me has snapped and I'm dreaming of taking turtleneck Christmas pictures with him. Fuck you, we're going out tonight. I need this.
Bathtub drinking tim. I have no pool so I work with what I have
I want to tell everyone I've ever met about how he him picking me up and fucking me against the wall was the highlight of my life. Worst lesbian ever.
Can we just get drunk and watch the Birdcage please I have no tolerance for straight men today
A huge penis doesn't warm the soul. Or that's what I've had to tell myself.
I got to walk around for eight hours wearing power armor and acting camp. No way I wouldn't love it.
He eats ass but won’t hold open doors. My kinda guy.
Chivalry really is dead.
Randomize
