Yeah, it was perfect until the end. Apparently women are super attracted to me until the sleeping with part.
Whatcha textin bout Willis?
Apparently someone switched my cash for monopoly money after midnight so I couldn't get any more drinks at the bar
We have a tower of vodka coming. OF VODKA
Im in the bathtub drunk. Less than an hour before the interview. This will be the best or worst career move ever., support?
Like it was the Mama Mia of shit shows. That bad.
Like we were literally doing coke off his insulin pump
I've been wearing the same clothes for 3 days and they're covered in franzia
It was a great party. People were literally still doing shots and playing drunk Jenga at 6am...
Jello shots and homoerotic movie scenes bingo?
This is like the first time all week I've properly taken my birth control. My ovaries are so stoked I just know it.
You grabbed my dick don't call me son
There is this guy in here. He didn't even get ice cream he just filled up his cup with mini marshmellows, chocolate syrup, about a lb of grahm cracker crumbs and walked around to everyone in the shop saying "hey, hey look here, I just made fucking s'mores." He was SO proud of himself.
Dude you came into the room last night soak and wet and told me you just took a shit in the shower
Longest 30 seconds of my life
10/10 so not recommended
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