I justed realized that the word 'turd" is present in saturday
IM INA KID IN KING ATURHTS CUNT!
A Kid In King Arthur's Court? Like the movie?
CUNT. CUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUNT
look to my right... shes dancing like she's playing dance dance revolution and her character is a retarded, drunken moose
No, I'm only going to drink half my paycheck. That's the responsible thing to do.
I'M GETTING MARRIED!
YOU'RE STILL MARRIED!
thought i was the most hungover person in class until i saw a kid puke into his bookbag...he wins
Ok the fact that you know THAT phrase perfectly is terrifying. You just proved you can slut it up in mulitiple languages.
It's home.......I'm going to the store in disguise to get skittles and cake frosting. Then I'll eat the frosting in a dark corner while I cry and wonder what I did to deserve this.
Puked in the trees at home depot, I told everyone it was fertilizeerr
Nothing gets you judged faster than having cum in your hair at the gas station.
We need large glitter to throw at people to signify our mystic nature
Fuck their feelings and their drinks they will get hit with sparkly confetti
I probably should have waited until after the game to pity fuck him. You know, seeing as we lost.
That dude with the beard walked up to me, turned my water into wine with everclear and kool-aid, and walked away. Pretty sure drunk Jesus is back.
i woke up at 4 pm face down on my hardwood living room floor. i would say its a new low but i think I found my new napping spot
the day i stop sending you hentai screenshots is the day i actually act like an adult, and TRUST ME. THAT AINT HAPPENING ANYTIME SOON.
Randomize
