i had just passed the point of no return when my mom opened my door. I hid my dick and took the porn off the computer in time but i still had to explain my day at school to her WHILE i was jizzing in my pants.
its like playing clue every morning after we party. she did him in the kitchen with..oh god.
Dating my ex's drug dealer.. best. revenge. ever.
Telling me its the beginning of school is like telling me the crown royal fairy has come back from vacation.
I have two stamps on my hand....ones from the bar and one is from an aquarium...care to explain?
New rule : you aren't allowed anything . Ever .
We found her on the trampoline. She told us she was jumping so she could puke & rally. I think I want to marry her.
Should I tell them about my ticket for possession or about how I'm shitting blood? Which one will gain the most sympathy?
I took a hang over nap infront of the door to my 9am class
I need a hug and tequila
I'm sitting next to a milk crate full of tequila right now
This is why we need to live in the same city again
Is selling savings bonds for acid money something a normal person does?
Someone should make a valentines day card that says "I like the way you continuously consume thc with no concept of a limit other than drug supply" Because I'd send that to you.
I'm not gonna ask the guy I've fucked like 3 times if he is insecure about his eyebrows.
I JUST AGREED TO GO TO A CHILD'S BIRTHDAY PARTY AT A PLACE CALLED PUZZLE'S FUN DOME WHY DO I HATE MYSELF
My head is bruised from having sex in the backseat of an explorer last night.
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