Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
did you ever find your cell phone? and your dignity?
Does getting a boner while watching the celtic women sing opera on ETV make me cultured?
I made a game called come to class high and eat nachos.
I think his parents are learning english from the phrases I shout during sex.
We were squawking at each other for over an hour like chickens. Literally. Never touching the stuff again and never again showing my face at that Denny's.
I just want you to know that I'm, like, 45% hard right now.
Time to eat Mexican food til I hate myself.
That's completely alright, I do it a lot.
Question #1: Why am I on my living room floor? Question #2: Where did the bloody footprints come from? Question #3: Why are there two McChickens next to the wine bottle?
Your shirt... Was in my pants
You’re sleeping on my couch so you’re not making dick appointments tonight
In my life time, I want nothing more than to get a blow job while watching Space Jam.
we were waffle house and a lady told me her imaginary friend was sitting in the chair next to her. i don't feel so trashy now.
I begin to question your sobriety when you both left here shirtless, with beers in one hand and shotguns in the other
don't think less of me for this, but i'm pretty sure he did a line off my boob last night.
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