I wish i could go to google and type in drug dealers and it would bring up a number, a product and direction
Nothing says Christmas like gin and tears.
All I remember was the chick screaming "don't hookup with him! His dick's the size of a cucumber"
an unopened bag of salt and vinegar chips... probably the best thing I've ever found in my room while high.
Apparently I promised a worker at La Siesta free English lessons to make up for vomming all over the little Mariachi band.
I knew it was going to be a good night when i heard another girl call his dick "Thor's Hammer"
ex-cheerleader. ex-gymnast. ex-dancer. i dont even know who to go for tonight
Don't ask me how or why, but I'm drunk with German diplomats. Come over. Now
I've never seen a dude bust out of his jacket and rock an air banjo like u
there is vomit in the pocket of my dress coat. i remember thinking "this is a weird place to puke" at some point in the evening, but i dont understand how i did this.
So to add to headbutting the microwave while waiting for my hot pockets to cook. I apparently told both bartenders earlier in the night I was going to fuck them both. I hate black out drunk me..
You left a bit of molly on the table and my mom found it. She asked what it was, I said "not drugs"
She believed me because "leaving that much behind on the table would be a waste so obviously it's not drugs."
Went home w the NY Islander in a NY Rangers jersey, needless to say he was pissed
THAT'S MY GIRL
KICKING BUT AND GETTING PEOPLE INTOXICATED
My theme for the night was drink diego drink! Unfortunately Dora was not there to navigate me to the bathroom
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