I've been reduced to Capt. Morgan and Golden Girls reruns. Ugh.
so then we both started to do the walk of shame and she didnt realize we had fucked in her apartment until some lady said hi to her in the elevator
you didnt stop her?
too entertaining
Nyc is like a mosaic of my failed dates.
question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
Everytime I think about NYE, my gag reflex kicks in.
Hold on there are flying pancakes I can't handle this right now
I'm drunk on a monday night. Not a good start to finals week
Boobs have been pretty central in my life somehow lately which makes me question if I am truly gay
I'm honored that you could tear yourself away from your girlfriend's vagina long enough to text me.
I'm only bisexual one week out of the month. Nothing like ovulation hormones to make the genders of my hookups seem completely irrelevant.
That was the first time I ever heard of a female getting road head while driving... thanks for the memory and making me happy ending..
I'm slacking. We've been hooking up for months and I have yet to bang him while he's wearing the clown mask.
I am NOT pregnant
My barren womb can FUCK WHOEVER I want
Interesting, I was always told to run away from crazy, but you seem to think we should run towards them dick first.
I look like a hot mess, emphasis on the hot now, more emphasis on the mess later
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