Only in college do people pre-game a meteor shower
Soo I got blood taken today and when the doctor came back with the results she said "you aren't sick but the tests show that you are currently drunk..."
just tripped. bootyfest 2012 will be my engagement party. i saw the whole future. i'm moving to the beach.
Do you remember snorting allspice and yelling at doughnut shop girl?
Suuuuuuper drunk and just sang fuck her gently to the chiminea. I'm in bad shape.
Talking to a male stripper. About the LSAT. Only in Vegas.
she crawled under her car and passed out. Unfortunately her feet were sticking out and someone called 911 because they thought she had been run over.
First week back and I made to one class, its gonna be okay after all.
Nothing brings people closer than bonding over tequila shots and running from campus security.
Also I'm eating leftovers with a pair of bullet removal forceps (unused) because I don't have a fork.
He sent me a pic stitch collage of all the tit pics I had sexted him this month. It was so sweet!
My day went from bad to worse when I realized I puked out my second floor window last night.
Her hookup left his underwear and shorts in the dorm last night... What he was wearing when he left, we may never know.
I'll give you a blowjob in a Santa hat if it will put you in the Christmas spirit
so i showed up to the bars in a sombrero and a tie as a headband... so yeah, they didn't let me in
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