I hate seeing commercials about babies when i'm high
Yeah, I don't like babies at all
This is how I know I have no life... Jon and Kate are my emotional roller coaster.
I have a drinking game planned. Were gunna watch empire records. Everytime they say rex manning we have to take a shot
Don't judge me. It was less weird than it sounds when we were in the moment and it was his birthday
I seriously just washed my dick in a public restroom. That's how dirty last night got
she has her graduation year in her skype name, it's like a constant reminder that she's jail bait.
My arms are sore from holding up pukeahontas for so long
he spent an hour trying to convince us that Ted Nugent is Kid Rock from the future. by the end of it i was very close to believing him.
New drinking game. Every time Romney and Santorum switch leads, take a shot.
....this is what your political science major is getting you?
I tried to make friends with the geese living behind Hughes. They didn't really like that idea.
Are you high?
Everything was cool till you started pissing while standing at the bar
no one ever believes me when I try explaining to them that your straight. I'm all like, "yeah that's his girlfriends dress he's stretching out"
I WANT TO JUMP IN TO A VOLCANO
I just ordered a five person drink for myself.... Right about now you should start saving me from myself....
the girls would appreciate it if you invited over some drunk, single, straight men with low standards.
Randomize
