About to do something stupid. You'll be my call. Bring bail money.
and all i could think was, am i really about to have sex with someone who still thinks that pee comes out of the actual vagina?
I love seeing the creepers that friend request me outside of facebook. its like seeing a unicorn in the middle of campus.
She was really sick last night--but i was too drunk to bring her chicken noodle soup after the bar, so went by taco bell and got her a chicken burrito instead
I have been running off of weed, alcohol, and Mexican food. What is Tallahassee.
Pretty much gone. He was in the backseat and kept whispering that his "toes felt like pigtails"
I slept with a married guy last night and then broke my toe on the doorframe on the way out. I've never seen karma work so fast.
tell me why they applauded then the bartender locked himself in the bathroom when i walked into the bar today ????
I would totally lead with that as a line.'So, I was on Legends of the Hidden temple as a kid.. Your place or mine?'
Okay Im still jerking off but now with the Reality of Law School Looming In The Distance
I'm literally beginning to think that my sex dreams are prophesies
I didn't see her "bad karma" tattoo until after I was balls deep
I have done everything sexualally imaginable with that umpalumpa
Literally been in their house 5 minutes and I've projectile vomited all over the bathroom wall. The dog licked it up though so I think it's cool.
Do u believe in the possibility of big foot?
You high??
Randomize
