ya dads aren't the best wingmen
I wont be hard to find. Im wearing a darth vader mask and I have a megaphone.
I just want to go some place where I can have a nice night. Grind on men who speak no English, make out with a girl, and not feel judged.
I just realized i came back home with my lei that one night. How do i forget my bra but remember my lei?
Just saw some guy puking out of the dorm window, its for sure monday
He started crying and showing me pictures of his ex. she was really pretty. It's an honor to have shared a penis with her.
You know how girls with huge tits have back problems? Do you get knee problems or something?
Dude he was a used car salesman for his friends' penises. I know I have something here that's right for you!
But he does seem to be getting proper humping etiquette down. So there's progress.
Hey. My eyes swollen shut and I can't find my shoes. How was your night?
I woke up and my backpack was empty. He used me for sex, and back to school supplies.
I can't have my last hookup before 21 have been behind a dumpster
You can't give me tequila around boys who have girlfriends. That ain't new.
First of all she starred talking about God which immediately killed my buzz
I'm just really glad SD weather is so erratic so I can get away with wearing a scarf in May to cover up these hickeys.
Randomize
