I want 2 things right now, you or a cig
cig
It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
I just walked through a room full of deaf people and farted i love deaf people
worst morning ever. completed my walk of shame home to find my parents, grandma, and priest had come down to surprise me on my birthday. now i'm in the car with them to go get my car from the bar.
And by that I mean I told her the plot of the first batman movie as my life and it took her like 20 minutes to figure it out
They didn't have a "sorry I was late for your birthday party because I was getting arrested" card.
Shame?!? Shame only comes from getting naked in front of strangers and it not being awesome
Are you feeling okay?
Right now, not a single thing feels even slightly okay. That hungover.
If your gig isn't over in 30 minutes I am coming on that stage to come on your dick.
Just got a snapchat from him that was a video of with the caption "my new apartment" in Brazil. I think we might not be seeing eachother anymore.
He didn't have much of a personality. But I had like 100 orgasms, so that's cool.
I REMEMBER NUGGETS BEING THERE BUT WE WERE AT A TACO BELL
I'm only fucking women born in the 90s this summer
HIGH AS FUCK. JUST WATCHED THE TRIPPIEST VIDEO EVER. IM NOT SCARED OF PANDAS. I GOTTA GO. TRIPPIN AGAIN
I would totally suck a dick for some poutine right now
Randomize