porn star on stage now. Get unkicked out.
The walk of shame is slightly more complicated when you wake up in the wrong country...
awesome recipe for disaster- bar hopping at the airport
So chef boyardee smells exactly the same after you throw it up
i literally discovered the exact same thing last week. i had the lasagna one
ravioli
My grandma just told me that she sharted, no I am not having fun in El Paso.
I'm spooning a three legged dog right now. Started drinking whiskey with Breakfast. Best part about being biracial is Irish cousins. Dog Pic Attahed
I'm currently sitting on the floor of a hostel reception area taking swigs of straight vodka, singing with people whose English doesn't go far beyond Lion King songs. I thought you might appreciate it.
what's the appropriate greeting for someone whose bed you've had sex with someone else in?
He gave me one look and told me I'm not allowed to board the plane if I'm still as drunk by departure time.
I gave a handjob to the beat of uptown fuck last night
Terrible idea I love it
Nothing says responsible like taking your birth control with an open bottle of wine you left on your night stand from the night before
I've had my dick out in public way too much for someone my age...
I couldn't find my contact solution so I thought mixing toothpaste and water would work
If I have put a neon “vacancy” sign on my skirt for him to get the picture I will.
Randomize
