I just saw the pics of me from the costume party as Party Boy. I've effectively cock-blocked myself forever.
she did the YMCA with her lgs... i think she forgot she wasnt wearing any underwear
I only want to screw him when I'm drunk. Problem is I try to be drunk as often as possible
Do you know how hard it is to write about pediatric crohn's when we're trying to figure out the keg situation for graduation?
Btw, you're my emergency contact at Planned Parenthood
Started my day with puking in a trash can.... Its gonna be a beautiful day
what's your room number? I've never been there sober...
I had sex in the bed of a guy who owns a house last night so I feel like this is a significant step up from car sex in the parking lot of a library
does anyone know where bryan is?
last i saw he was naked, and crying in the bathroom because there was no more booze.
I slept with six men with different nationalities this week. Who says I'm not a woman of culture?
He bent me in ways I couldn't imagine.. and im a gymnast.
Lesson Learned: It's not a party until someone pisses their pants.
I stole a block of cheese from the party last night and put it in my purse but I got so drunk that I left my purse on the floor and my dog ate it.
We live walking distance from the coors factory. no, we do not have a dry week.
Pro: 2020 made it easier to hook up with strippers
Con: explaining to Kari why there’s always strippers at our house
Pro: there’s always strippers at our house
Randomize
