The dr is doing well, he randomly asked if I was bi
it's business casual sex. like no kissing, shake hands after, occasional frequency
I just saw a girl walking home wearing a tshirt, boxers, and cowboy boots. Thanks for having the decency to drive me to my car.
Are you still giving blowjobs?
Who is this?
they described our state of being as looking similar to a crime scene....you were on the ground and i was running around screaming.
Were playing bathroom attendees at the party and making people wash their hands
i made a dollar
She drove all the way from Austin to have sex with me. I think it's a safe assumption my dick will have an easy life in college.
Just got a blow job while taking my online quiz. How is life in the dorms treating you?
Your ankle brace is here and the saw is charged. Grab some vodka that cast is coming off tonight.
i dont know whats weirder. that i told him he stabbed me in my dream or that he told me i wasnt the first girl to tell him theyve been killed by him in a dream
You better keep a close eye on your uterus tonight cause I am looking good.
words I never want to hear dad say again: "Trevor you sexy man you"
He came over last night and as soon as we started having sex Siri announced "you've arrived at your destination." I think it was some kinda sign
I've really become a household name at this fraternity. Mother would be so proud.
Why did u text me "I want to get drunk and go to pizza hut tomorrow. don't let me forget." at 3am??
That text was pretty fucking self-explanatory, man.
Randomize
