My goal for this summer is to make enough extra money to be able to afford the ticket for water skiing naked.
Do you think flip cup during wine tasting is a bad idea? They're perfect flipping cups...
When she e-mailed me back asking for proof, complete with hospital intake records, I just told her it was a home-birth. I'm prepared to take the fail.
Well if my looks don't work with her I'll eat the 50 nuggets to impress her fat roommate.
Im drinking in homer but I guess Egan got arrestest on an "assault by water ballon" charge but tom actually threw the water balloon in question at the bartender.
yea i really dont care about the sex, i just want him to eat my vag. He has to be good at because of his tremors.
He came in both my eyes, then refused to give me a towel unless I found him by playing Marco Polo
her mom went out of her way to book us a room with separate beds... her level of gay denial is in beast mode
The Winnie the Pooh costume was great until you got drunk and started yelling at the kids asking for pictures.
Move ovrr Titanoc and all you others. Heres the real tale of woe. This ladys failed search for boozdy goodnezs.
Wikipedia just saved you three hours and $30 on a bar tab. You should donate.
$5. Donated.
I just did a bump with my mom so I’d sober up for Black Friday shopping
You know the rule about how you feel bad for getting food and not offering other people you're around, does that apply when you eat burger king at a strip club?
did you call me last night and say you were being kidnapped?
One can only be this extremely wet once a year and I feel like I'm bitch slapping god by not using this gift he has bestowed on me.
Randomize