At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
hey bro how do you do that fake vagina thing with the tp roll? im bored.
i think i scared a bird with my dick
I told her that if she blew me I would give her the empty pizza box in the fridge.... Why did she agree?
Ohh man do you know how awkward it is to keep eye contact and have a normal conversation with someone while their hand is in your vagina?
We forgot to go back and get the brick YOU WANTED TO BRING INTO THE BAR?
I still can't believe you had sex with someone who willingly went by Peaches.
Guess which frat house I just walked out of! And on a related note... guess who's uncircumsized
Ok. I am hammered I will admit it but my legacy needs to live and your the only woman that could spawn satan. We need to talk.
Had sex with the Irish bartender in Spain. So that happened.
I'm pretty stoned, and for a second I forgot that I'm not actually Barbie and I was getting excited about all the fun we were going to have on my jet.
You climbed out your own window and walked in the front door..
Your uterus is safe from my father's misconstrued prophecies.
Just paid for my STD meds using a giftcard I got for Christmas. Thanks mom.
and idk now I have nine bags of lettuce in my fridge
Randomize
