I wish I only lived at night.
Hooked up with my old baby sitter last night, so what do I do? As I was sucking her tits I decided it would be a good idea to say " goo goo gah gah"....it wasn't a good idea.
Just found two Xanax on the floor at the tanning bed. And yes, Im taking them...looks like going to get cancer is paying off
All i remember as you were making ramen is that you kept slurring "i like you as a color"...
that was after you ironed the burrito. didn't leave much cheese on the ironing board though
I know your texting costs money, but I'll pay for it if you consider this. Oversized frozen jello shots. I'll buy everything needed if you approve. Let me know
well someone pooped in the lint basket in the laundry room last night, but none of us will admit to it so we're all just secretly judging each other and doubting ourselves.
He woke me up for a 10am bootycall. he was already drunk when he got here and when we were fucking, bagpipes started playing amazing grace outside of my window!! I love Boston on st. Patties day!!
My roommates just built a mini golf course upstairs while I was sleeping.
dont iron anything. we fucked on the ironing board. details to follow.
We can just chill or day drink or smoke or watch law and order marathon or play just dance 4 or watch a movie or go to the movies or play hide and seek or hug, so many options
Serious question: does drunken cyber sex with a stranger on omegle count as cheating???
Under no circumstances is tits McGee to make that kind of decision about my life!
And remember people can't hear you kick ass in space
I party with great urgency now.
Randomize
