no... you woke up naked next to the toilet because you said your outfit was too cute to throw up in
Have $25 to my name but it's $2 pitchers. I have no choice but to go.
it was like getting a handjob from robocop
going to class with no bra.. is that saying "i don't give a fuck i'm one hour away from thanksgiving break?"
I found his retainer in my ass crack. It smells like shame.
By the third Id pass back i figured the bouncer had fucked one of us.
Honestly the war on drugs is dumb and you can just sleep in my bed which is mega comfortable anytime you want. There I said it
We stared down the barrel of pure insanity, took more and the electric elephant god rewarded our fearlessness by giving me golden skulls and naked women crawling out of the walls. I love acid
I'm going home because your Crackraptor step-brother tried getting his nasty meat hawks in my pants last night.
I felt like in order for him to make it to mordor and destroy the ring, he'd have to make sweet sweet love to me in some form of hut or cave.
Oh, in response to your "does dating get better" question...I feel like penises are getting smaller nowadays. Its been several years since I saw a good 8+ incher.
I don't remember his name. I had whataburger on my mind and in my hands so I wasnt really listening
I'm pretty sure ignoring the person that just sent you a picture of their boobs is bad nude etiquette.
If I die write a nice eulogy and bury me with my star wars bobbleheads
I woke up in my neighbors backyard with glitter on my teeth and sparklers super glued on my bra. which part was your fault?
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