MTV running anti-sexting commercials is a slap in the face to everything our generation has accomplished.
Some girl next to me in class is making a list of whta to pack for spring break & it was a normal list until she put birth control in all caps w/ stars around it
We've been fucking since Friday.... This is the most committed non-committed relationship I've ever been in
Since you haven't talked to me since the rancid whipped cream fiasco, I'm going to assume we are no longer hooking up. But I need my handcuffs back. ASAP.
Should I feel bad that my boyfriend pays for my birth control and his friends get to reap the benefits?
Finally considering to keep my landing strip before I have sex.. I feel like It makes me look mature.
Also, I threw up on the playground again. I've honestly had more fun there this past summer than I did in my entire childhood.
She took a crow from her moms Halloween decorations, taped it to her shoulder, went to the bar and made the guys buy a drinks for both her and the crow.
Just got motor boated by a horse in the street
This will be the 3rd time you have blacked out and lost your phone only to have some kind stranger find it, charge it, call me, then mail it back to you. Your luck amazes me...
Dude, she sent me a nude of her posing in the mirror and her dad was in the reflection
He literally knows my vagina better then I do.
The beauty of getting kicked out of college again is I can fuck my professor's brains out and she can't get fired now
Instead of texting me to come over, she just sends me a batman symbol.
I don't care if she's a booty call. Marry her.
Btw I thought it was impossible to use up 48 bottles of patron in one night but I was wrong...
Randomize