don't thank me. stop putting your penis in foreign objects.
I made her cum... she sounded like Ray Romano
He took out the lube and started calling it fuck fluid
There is something depressing about eating toast in a dark living room by myself using a paper plate that says: "Let's Party!"
a guy tried paying for lapdances with cds, who uses those anymore?
I just want a guy that likes cats and is willing to get a vasectomy. IS THAT SO MUCH TO ASK?!
My neighbour is taking her hamster for a walk on a leash. Come over now
Get a piano. I want to have sex on it.
I'm not driving across town for three thrusts and an excuse
Don't worry, I could have been accepted their by waving my dick at the admissions building.
I was angry that a college kid had a new Audi
so I peed on it
I'm sorry I lead life with my vagina.
I just want cinnabon and vodka.
the girl next to me was drawing sonic the hedgehog on her exam what the fuck
godspeed
i sent him a picture of his friend's dick and told him he should really stop thinking he's my only option.
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