Dude, Erin Andrews has a nude video circulating the internet.
Is it any good?
Let me put it this way: I bet Stuart Scott's lazy eye went straight after watching that.
I know I'm really high but I swear I just saw him beating off to his fantasy football roster.
If one more "stranger" walks up to me at the bar and asks how I have been, I am going to rehab.
The highlight of my night was definitely explaining the bandaid on my nipple.
She is screaming bc she thinks you jumped out the window...please show her you just went out for a smoke
He is crying over the toilet and his friends just came in and tried to make him take another jello shot.
My dad found me naked curled up under a towel on the couch with a fucking tub of butter and a spoon. Ambien Mondays are dead
The second I see you we're shot gunning beers
It's gonna be 8 o'clock in the morning
And your point is?
Marry me
Hey, I'm renting a storage locker for the summer to keep all my bondage shit in so my parents don't see it. You wanna split on it for your all your weed shit?
Oooo. Can we pretend to be Amanda Bynes?
She bought wigs like Disney princesses. I want to be her.
I'm sun burnt so instead of getting drunk and trying to sleep with you, how about we get naked and you scratch my body and rub lotion on me while I rub one out?
Can you send me the picture you took of me smoking a joint with the cat make-up on?
he'll eat me out, but god forbid we double dip when sharing salsa
I'm the one who said we should take things slow. I'm also the one who forced him into the back on my car so we could have sex.
The last time I was on vacation the pandemic blew up. Can't wait to see how my vacation fucks up the world this time.
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