Dude, Erin Andrews has a nude video circulating the internet.
Is it any good?
Let me put it this way: I bet Stuart Scott's lazy eye went straight after watching that.
God gave me these boobs for a reason other than for people to throw things down them.
No dude, you can't hot box a bus shelter.
Oh my fucking god I saw the pictures. What the mother fucking fuck. Destroy the pictures. Destroy the fucking pictures.
Please confirm the destruction of the pictures. NOW.
I've decided I want to blow you wearing a santa hat.
Aren't rabbit ears more seasonally appropriate?
did i send you the picture of me smiling with the magnum wrapper?
8:30 every morning in the third floor bathroom we fuck in the handicap stall. You have your morning workout and I have mine.
Well, thats the first guy to go to jail because of my vagina
Post that event on your timeline
Do the molecules within bourbon change when mixed with a cola to form a superior liquid treat?
all the one night stand stories i have end with me crying on my RA's floor stuffing cupcakes into my mouth
I felt like I was having sex with Joffrey from Game of Thrones. Needless to say how bad it was
But I am still fully ok with my life choices as long as the consequences aren't onesies and pacifiers
I swear I get as excited about the sound of a condom wrapper as my cat gets when she's getting a can of food.
I have successfully trained your dog to bring me pudding cups!
Wait wait wait. You are actually taking advice from this lunatic?
This is the girl who got a balloon full of cocaine through security no questions asked. Of course I'm taking her advice.
Valid.
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