Well you broke that rule when you put it in your mouth.
we're havin a 400 loko party for joe pa's 400th win. come get loko
She's riding a tiny four-wheeler and has a Dos Equis in her hand. I at least have to meet her.
the boys love us. they call us "the stoner girl suite down the hall". not very inspired, but flattering nonetheless
I'm so confused. I feel like I just intentionally took roofies to see where I'd end up.
He drunk dialed me at 2am asking if he could put a baby in me.
She took one look at my hardon and said, "You have a dick built for anal."
That wasn't a compliment.
Like an undercooked grilled cheese that got cold again. But hairy.
And there goes my desire for sandwiches. Forever.
Just got home. Taking a quick shower. I smell like sex and chorizo. Dont ask.
I think it's a scientific achievement that I can make jelly that is 95% vodka so suck it up.
Or I could hide in your trunk so you can sneak out of putt putt for sex breaks
Thanks for putting up with my drunk friend last night. Its all fun and games till someone pukes macaroni under your fridge.
Personally, I'm gonna be Sexy Dobby the House Elf.
danced like there was no tomorrow. surprise. there's a tomorrow
I've come to the conclusion, I should prob have at least 20 hr supervision. I would say 24, but I'm guaranteed to pass out for at least 4 hrs a day
Randomize
