shit is crazy. i just keep thinking that this kid growing inside Emily used to live in my balls.
I asked him where the store BJ's was and he unzipped his pants.
did i really try to jack off an athens police horse last night? please tell me youre kidding..
Its gonna be a symphony of fucks
She pulled out a handful of chest hair. And then gave the room a Brave Heartesque speech.
Just slept with a female bodybuilder. not cute. but it was like fucking hulk hogan with a twat. Beastly.
im so disgusted with myself. funny thing was i lasted 15 seconds. she benches 325
I had him autograph the condom wrapper.
No, we got so into acting out our role play characters we didn't even fuck. still sucess.
Oh I love our desires, it's riding my bike at 2 AM with a massive erection that I dislike.
I think my Halloween costume this year will be made entirely of pillows and I'll be Marshmellow girl or Kirby. That way I'm comfortable, warm, and if I fall over drunk I'm safe.
I forgive you, at least you vote. I found out my fuck buddy isn't even registered. I won't fuck a non respectable citizen.
He may not be fully over his current wife yet. But wait until I show him my tits in his office at the end of the day tonight.
This is the nicest bathroom I've ever been drunk in. The urinal is gold.
I would really like it if you guys got out of my bush
No reason. My tongue went numb after one shot. I may die tonight
Randomize
