yo i have your phone
... oh so you probably won't get this message
All we had was a keg so we played edward nalgene-hands
I don't know what you drank last night but you really enjoyed the 4 egg body shots.
just tried to puke while my RA was trying to puke in the stall next to me.bonded for life
It's the only time I've ever felt manly shitting myself
Also, I imagined that his bacne was bubblewrap and that made it much more tolerable
Abby spilt her vodka all over the train's bathroom floor
WE'RE THE ONES DRESSED UP FOR THE LARGEST DRINKING HOLIDAY IN AMERICA WHO ELSE ON THIS TRAIN IS A SUSPECT FOR THIS SMELL?!
A beef tasting is not what I needed while hungover
Remember when we were coked out at that house and we were trying to meditate in the bathroom? Who's house were we at?
So unless we're getting married, I can't see him cry AND have sex with him. It just doesn't work like that.
Let's go. I'm waiting for my time to shine among the stars of never never land. Make sure you bring my Peter Pan costume this time. Shit's bout to get real glittery.
I woke up with gum stuck to my nipple piercings this morning.. So there's that.
My entire grocery store purchase consisted of Little Debbie snacks and Budweiser
I literally just woke up in a dog bed, in a bathtub in someone else's house...and I'm not wearing pants
is it bad that there is a girl in my bed right now and the only thing i can think about is the fect that its after 3am which means i cant order jimmyjohns unitll tomorrow?
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