you were asking all the dicks on chatroulette if they had daddy issues
If you can't do the LSAT hung over. You can't do the LSAT. That's the real practice.
My fave moment of today was you sitting in a hot pink innertube puking into the ocean in front of a lot of children. i would have held your hair back but the ocean did it for you.
I managed to convince him it was his fault I cheated on him...he spent the last 40 minutes going down on me. I feel legendary.
He had the smallest penis i'd ever seen. I can see why he drinks his life away.
I think im drinking tonight later on...which is good cuz i walked pass the liquor aisle the other day and i swear i heard a kid call me a pussy
im never drinking wine from a person in a wet suit and goggles ever again.
His mom already thought we were lesbians BODY SHOTS WERE JUST NOT AN OPTION SORRY
So last night I kicked a beer can off of a frat guys head and it nailed one of my sisters in the face. Think i'll be brought up on standards?
Now I can't say for certain but I'm 90 percent are I bathed myself with dog shampoo last night
Seriously I am not buying you condoms anymore. You're 22, if you aren't woman enough to buy them yourself then you don't deserve orgasms. Grow some tits.
If my birthday doesn't end with my panties hanging from a ceiling fan, I'm holding you responsible.
I forgot what I was gonna say, but I'm pretty excited to not be pregnant.
as I was leaving in the morning with his clothes on his roommate pops up and goes 'don't you dare steal that shirt, i gave it to him for his birthday'.
Ignore him I am the one that wears the pants in the relationship while "the big man" cries in bed
Randomize
