3:26am: come over
you purposely dodge me and you could have stopped me from leaving, you know how far i live. YOU come over
4:11am: mnlodp
dude I don't understand hebrew and I'm not coming over
Omg! Love it! Cant find L*****
What!!?? Like after last night you lost her?
Yea me and L***** came back to out hotel at 3am to regroup then went back out; police and 2 bars later, I don't know what happened. Vegas is nuts!
You put your red cup in a chain link fence and kept telling me you could use it as a telescope
So I got a little fucked up on the punch, and made out with the family friend. Which is apparently morally reprehensible. I don't get that.
We were drinking cognac with TAB. I felt like trailer park royalty.
Does your throat ever get sore from being choked too hard or do u think I'm just getting sick??
Last two new years I ended in jail by 12. Can we wait until its actually 12:02 this time to do something stupid. I'd like to spend the first minute of 2012 free.. At least.
He wore nothing but a Speedo and a tie to the party. It was great. Everyone was looking at him like "this kid's the best"
Can I just say I love the fact that were in business with guys where I can write a hand job up hoes down text message
They used the ice bucket from their room to drink beer from and called it the "Holy Grail"
I've decided that it's a bad thing. But I've also decided that I don't give a fuck.
I also just stashed a half dozen bobby pins in my bra.... So when you take it off later, consider yourself warned
Let's put it this way, there's not many girls I wouldn't let sit on my face
I just realized I haven't looked at our horoscopes lately. If mine says anything about tweakers, I'm burning my phone.
Oh shit oh shit oh shit.
BURN THE PHONE.
You're the only person I know who's experienced a micropenis and a magnum XL penis
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