she looked like the before picture.
One of my students just said I have "big mommy parts". Even third graders know that my tits are too big. God I love em.
I found a picture of my kindergarten class. Now you can see whose peer pressure I succumbed to.
Jeff just maced a waitress...it's way too early for this.
he told me he was a chubby chaser.. then winked. i'm signing up for a gym pass as we speak
My heart is having a hard time convincing my vagina he's not worth it.
If you were curious as to how many pounds of bagged marijuana can fit in the trunk of a 2010 Chevrolet Aveo, we now have the answer
Itd be like fucking a waterbed thats been locked in a barn for two years.
Where in the FUCK do you get your analogies
You showed them your nipple for dollars for the jukebox. You were depressed because only one of your songs played. Oh then you twisted your ankle and blamed it on your mad stripper skills.
No shame in my game.
I inhaled my own vomit, how was your night?
I just wish he'd leave so I can vomit in peace.
I feel like I could get pregnant watching Zac Efron do yard work in this movie
He also wore a doorag last night so i had to swipe left.
i mean ive seen your left buttcheek how much more bro can this get
No, he came home, unscrewed all of the lightbulbs, and threw them in the sink.
Randomize
