I love my grandma, but if I have to sit and watch one more show on Bravo, I'm gonna burn her fuckin house to the ground
My roommate just did the walk of shame in last nights corset back to our room to find her dad there. THATS why i go to school out of state.
oh but the power of the cock will take you to places you never been..i flew to hawaii once to sleep witha chick
once you get past the part where you think youre gonna die, its the most amazing drug ive ever experienced.
she worked me into her spring break cardio plan. im mondays and wednesdays.
you sat in the middle of your kitchen floor feeding your dog blueberries one by one
full cup flip cup was not exactly the reason I wanted to tell the cops when I was sleeping on the curb
I just masturbated while eating dinner. Now who's the lazy one
Now that I'm born again, I'm preserving my gift.
Your vagina isn't a White Elephant gift. You can't re-wrap it after it's already been given several times. That's white trash thinking.
We don't watch enough power rangers
dude ur drinkin a beer not ta capri sun. lose the straw
Meh, all I have to do tomorrow is proctor an AP test. No loud noises and no physical activity allowed for almost 4 hours. Sounds like the perfect recovery period for a hangover.
Don't tell me I can do whatever makes me happy while also saying I have to put on pants.
you ate an entire watermelon by using a CD as a spoon, then proceeded to chuck the leftovers at some dudes car...
Can I come over and get it in, take a nap in ur bed, grab some poptarts and then leave?
You haven't lost that air of class about you...
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