Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
She told me she only masterbates to Kenny Rogers songs.
OMG. What did u say?
I told her I did too.
we didnt fuck last night. again. seriously, his place is like where dreams go to die.
Deffinety need to stop having sex on the beach just took a dump and it was mostly sand
I drunk madeout with my mom last night. it's guna be an awkward breakfast.
I demand visitation hours with the duck.
I wonder if a fish could survive in vodka
I could
Guess who just sucked off 1/5 of one direction?
What! You have to go to class. Otherwise, you're wasting money that could have been spent on weed. Gotta get that shit in perspective.
The only thing I know is that these arent my shoes and Aaron is missing and he has my house keys.
Well I'm missing half a toenail if that's any indication of my night
Just watched my first Christmas porn of the year. Def have the spirit now
there is partying, then there is whatever we did last night.
A girl in McDonalds just asked if I was in here wasted a few nights ago throwing fries at the staff, I said it was my twin
We both know that wasn't me
At least I’m an “essential employee” and can still bang my boss. \n\nFingers crossed my husband doesn’t ask why I’m essential, the orgasms are too good to give up during this pandemic
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