I sometimes forget that turkeys are alive even when its not Thanksgiving.
its like think what a normal person would think but completely the opposite.
ok this is the part where i go up stairs and pass out incoherently untill 6 30 tommaorw morning and not rember any of this. love youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu!
So for Valentine's Day...I finally swallowed. I feel like I earned that steak.
And then he said he would build me a mountain dew water fountain
Marry him now.
And thanks to you I'm pretty sure I'm banned from every qdoba in south carolina. And cab company
I'm on the same pooping schedule as a professor I've never had. He now says what's up to me in the hallway
Yeah probably not. I have a hair appt, a gun class, and hopefully a boy to fuck. I'm booked.
I think someone cast a spell on the lazy stoner rich boy stereotype and it came to life and called me.
Of course i made out w him. He was painted green. You know of my secret longing for the Hulk.
Is there a hallmark card for "could you please slide the FUCK out of my DMs"....?
Seriously, you just banged the guy that wishes his dog happy birthday on fb. That's fucking adorable!
She was wearing a grass skirt and a watermelon bra. WATERMELONS.
Little does she know that you've out-sourced your conscience to a girl who doesn't even wear pants on a regular basis
I just bought sparkling water with plan B. I am the most basic bitch to ever exist.
Randomize