i'm signing you up for texting rehab
My balls had bee stings let's just leave it at that.
I turn the corner to find her walking in the front door in a tee-shirt, two different shoes and no pants. All she said to me was "I'm sad"
I made a tournament bracket for the girls that Im talking with.
I am currently listening to someone take a shit. I hate the hole in the ceiling.
she gave me head while i watched the '98 Rose Bowl on espn classic. Ryan Leaf really was a huge bust
You should make it a point to use vocabulary that is competition appropriate around him, like "champion" and "training" and "victory sex"
You can glorify being single all you want but relationships are awesome. I haven't gone more than 24 hours without sex since June.
All I could think about while he was going down on me was that his moustache reminded me that I want to try something new with my pubic hair.
Are you kidding me????? How bout, IM SORRY FOR CALLING YOU 16 TIMES AND LEAVING YOU A TWO MINUTE VOICEMAIL OF MYSELF THROWING UP.
The first crop top of the year and you're rocking it in the ER. #ratchet
What is my life?
Sexiest use of a semi colon this week, congratulations.
lmao he sent me a snapped but i'm afraid to open.
i think i have dick pic PTSD.
Literally I woke up the other day and the girl part of me was like “GET CUFFED MOTHERFUCKER” and I went ham on tinder.
I’m sorry, some of us common-folk don’t have access to steady dick
Randomize
