"Monday" is guna come over...
but its Thursday?
yeah, but she cant make it.Monday can...so there ya go
so high. i feel like my whole body is a boner
Riding home in a carseat. Worst. Night. Ever.
six shots in, he is hammered and doing stretches before each shot
at least after i hook up with someone i have the decency to ignore them
being alone eating nachos and drinking from a giant munchen beermug really isnt that sad
It was just a squirrel
You act like its normal to see a squirrel in the bar
and my souvenir for the night was a nice ambulance blanket
Everytime the frat boy touches his bro's ass after making a cup take a drink
I never want to hear the words unlimited shots for boobs in the same sentence ever again.
Thought it only fitting this Jubilee weekend to snort lines with a 50 note
Your patriotism amazes me, the Queen would be proud!
Just found weed in my belly button. Happy Saturday!
Im gonna go for the gay guy. The ginger is freaking me out.
Betting for two different teams with two different guys is the best. Time to get $100 by one guy and laid by the other!
I don't think it's a coincidence that the day I just happen to do the splits at the gym I come back with 7 guys' phone numbers.
Randomize
