Want to have sex later?
This feels like a trap
I just heard these 2 kids from flint and Detroit arguing over whose economy is worse... It's really sad what passes for competition in Michigan these days
we need a dd. For wednesday. At lunch. What are we doing with our lives?
succeeding
I think i can make this amish girl legitimately hot.
I have Retrograde Ejaculation as a side effect from one of my meds. Is this a respectable form of birth control?
I figured you left because I was a shit show. Were you still there when I got locked in the bathroom and didn't know where I was? If not, that could have been a dream. I'm still not sure.
Well good for him for getting your number before he told you he had no money and needed you to pay for his drink!
I'm unsure as to how you were able to snapchat me with your hands duck taped to beer, but I appreciated it nonetheless.
I have no idea. But I feel like I could climb a mountain and then have sex on it.
I don't know if we can compare high school reunions anymore. The keg stands started before 7.
I just realized in a weird reversed way I hustled a stripper last night
I'm at the point where I'm more upset that he got to keep my bottle of Fireball than that he stopped talking to me with no explanation
When the state fair security guard came to yell at her for having outside food and drink she threatened to kick him if he tried to stop her and then she proceeded to chug the whole bottle.
classic
I just put poptarts in the toaster with the wrapper on, that's how hungover I am.
You know you're getting old when you pick up hot sorority girls at the bar, and they write down their phone number, and under it 'we're great babysitters!'
Randomize
