honestly, who buys weed with an unemployment check?
you.
oh yeah. preciate
Holy cold harsh reality of sobriety batman
drunk pissing on my closed toilet lid is actually quite a sobering experience
made out with three guys on the first night of college orientation, just imagine what joys all of next year will hold
FACT: the parking lot attendant was yelling "NO SEX HERE! NO SEX" at yall.
I just found our entire wall-to-wall from September 2006 printed out and clipped... it's 49 pages. Blackout me is so considerate of bored-at-work me
sorry can't. you know Saturday is the masturbating day for single sorority girls here.
I just put on eyeliner and a diff shirt in case the pizza guy is cute. This is what my dating life has come to
Like when I see him I look straight through his appearance and just envision a big walking penis.
Just had sex in the room next to my parents. Heading back to school ASAP.
I can still be you friend and be there for you. And sometimes get drunk and fuck you.
a victory without nudity is not really a victory
Once you find out someone has a small dick, you never look at them the same again.
like sometimes I wish I was allergic to latex so I wouldn't have sex with so many people..
On this version of “Dean Can’t Be a Normal Fucking Human,” I told a guy I’d shove a tv up his ass. Recreationally.
Plasma, LED or OLED?
Randomize
