Pregaming class all semester has made this final review session more like my introduction to the topic.
no memory loss, but i'm unhappy with my memories
he has officially spend more money on me than any other boy. and its all gone to plan b. awesome.
my shower just felt like jesus cried on me. like he shed tears just for my shower.
So she just apologized to the fire extinguisher.
I'm thinking we can stop tracking my sex life by the hotels I've hooked up in and instead use bar bathrooms I've gotten head in.
The next time you try to involve a tickle me Elmo in my orgasm, I'm leaving you
Is it too early to say this year has been a blur?
I feel like the only phrases I can clearly speak while drunk consist of: i'm fucking drunk, chug, and shots
exactly. I want him to have to live with the fact that he fucked me. I want him to look me in the eye and say "you were a drunken mistake".
Yeah, but I think it would be a little awkward to explain to Mom that the girl I brought for lunch is not my girlfriend but just a fuck buddy who I met after she hit and totaled my car last month.
I have stickers all over my boobs and a lump the size of china on my forehead. today has not been good.
Is it too early to get staydrunk at 1pm on Friday for Monday's St Patty's day
I just smoked a joint and ate a sandwich while watching someone get arrested. Bonnaroo is a silly place.
I remember you banged her while I was dying on your couch, so good call
Randomize
