no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
You hurt me so bad and it feels so good
I cant find my shoes, my wallet, or my keys, but i know where your sister is.
I need Christmas break to be over. I'm tired of fucking my old High School girlfriends
Dude let's go to Saudi Arabia. They outlawed valentine's day. And probably love.
And "sexual slave/chef" was as it turns out not a real career choice...
its not a party unless mikie exposes himself
I love my boobs, they're the only thing that supports me. They make me a solid 6.
I just took a shower and found half a cookie melted under my boob. Please tell me there's a reason
Just called the consul general of France "dude"
GET OVER HERE. HOTTIE ALERT
^^^This is why you should have charged your phone prior to going out.
you know you should be lucky to find the case to my dildo....that means no more random guys at the house!
What are you doing tomorrow?
Dude its my bday. Im drinking from sunup til face down. Rinse and repeat.
Dude my cat is eating sugar cookies with me. No joke. My cat likes cookies.
There's wax on my nightstand, my sheets look like Christmas, and my vagina feels like it got into a fight. All signs of a good night
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