I'm worried someone is gonna take a black light to my work computer. But the connection is faster here.
I probably wouldn't hook up with him if I had to deal with more than his penis. i think cumulatively we are up to a minute of actual conversation this week.
She rolled over this morning and asked "did you refer to my vagina as splash mountain last night? "
What is an appropriate "thanks for saving my life" gift? I don't have any experience with this.
We eventually had to ration the melon vodka. 10 pushups per shot. THATS why my arms hurt
We were all definitely blackout with drunk goggles on, even though you and Amanda were the only ones dressed up as it.
He's gotta be able to drive a truck, make me mac n cheese and give me the best orgasms. That's my perfect man
THERE IS NOT ENOUGH CAPSLOCK IN THE HISTORY OF THE WORLD TO EXPRESS MY CURRENT STATE OF WHAT THE FUCK JUST HAPPENED
I'm getting better, this year I only showed up drunk to 1 final.
I took did three shots of fireball and did and handstand. When I stood up some busty slut lead me my the hand down the hall into her dorm room.
But I'm sure your having and "a monumentally better time" repeating the 12th grade
Also, we found a geriatric Snoop Lion.
I need more than 2 fuckable people this is an outrage
I woke up and found my apartment really clean, appearantly drunk me couldn't tolerate living there anymore and left sober me a lot of insulting post-its...
Is it ok to bone a former patient who is also a client? Since it is two negatives does that cancel and become a positive?
Nothing like an afternoon walk of shame across campus on parent's weekend. Damn.
Randomize
