Is there a reason "Call me when you're legal" is written on my arm? I'm 22..
this is like her 8th guy since december, is she wasn't frumpy people would call her a whore
Soo both my 8 year old sister and fuck buddy are named Sarah..
this can't be going anywhere good
nooope. guess which one i texted last nite to come over so i could "punish her pussy"? =\
The man at the Honda dealership told me I smell like vodka and probably shouldn't be driving.
Dude...that line about her giving me a blowjob to get rid of her hangover actually got rid of her hangover. Spread the word.
He ate me out on the balcony. My asian neighbors cats are judging me...ALL 3 OF THEM!!
he may be homeless but his dick however is not... anymore.
If you two are having sex, stop. I have something really important to ask you about psychics.
Please just fuck her. She's new to LA and doesn't know anyone nice.
DON'T YOU TELL ME I HAVE HERPES ON MY BIRTHDAY. THAT IS MOST DEFINITELY NOT A HAPPY BIRTHDAY.
You know that girl that climbed through my window and got in my bed with me and fucked me? It turns out she was real and has a real boyfriend who is real pissed
We had sex on his sofa while his friend cheered and threw bugles at us
You used a fucking bud light like as lube last night. I'd get a UTI test like stat.
Maybe if I ever do become a counselor, I would just implement a kind of intensive meme therapy.
You can make out without kissing
Explanation needed
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