i dont know why he would complain when i touch him there.
also. he gave me a foot massage during 69ing when i got a cramp. he's a winner.
Just woke up to find myself cooking eggs on the imaginary stove in my room.
my favorite part of the night was when I was in the bathroom frantically trying to get my cat whiskers and nose off to make hooking up less awkward
Barack Obama mentioned plan B and suddenly this address seems a lot more personal
Under someone's bed. Not sure whose. I think they're sleeping in it.
VODKA 4LOKO BEER NOT IN THE CLEAR
If we ever start off with margaritas for breakfast and end up naked covered in olive oil...I could think of worse ways to spend a day.
These bathrooms are miraculous. I'd love to have sex in here. Wow. I've peed 5 times.
Her Grandmother felt me up AND paid for dinner. If she doesn't get her shit together I'm gonna be her Step Grandfather.
I thought monday through wednesday was a YOLO free zone.
Where did this racoon skin hat, stop sign and bag full of tacos come from?
Narnia or $5 pitcher night either way
So I vote that we skip the bowling and just go straight to destroying our livers.
She tried doing a backflip and ended up doing somersaults down the entire stair case.
You were yelling at them from the passenger seat saying you wanted your chicken for free because they couldn't prove it was from kentucky
Randomize
