Reminder- he's a douche bag. A big one.
Until that no good dick sucking whore stays away from my boyfriend I am gonna start blowing all of his friends...
At a sweet 16. cant remember what shirt im wearing byt dnt worry im not sleeping w/ the guy who serves the chicken nuggets again
She told me a very interesting story, complete with pantomimes, about how she got a habanero seed in her vag
It is virtually impossible to listen to single ladies and perform any seated task.
he was writing an apology letter to his liver in shakespearean english... That much fun...
Just finished my law exam. Questions 4-18 seemed to pertain specifically to things we've done this semester.
The difference between what I would do for a regular Klondike bar and an Oreo flavored Klondike bar is astounding
Apparently we had sex last night, and then I made him drive me to the beach so I could puke in the ocean.
I would lick a homeless mans crack teeth for a cup of coffee right now.
So i had a feeling this dude with one leg in a wheelchair was following me around Walmart turns out I was right. He just asked for a picture of my feet.
i mean i let him but still...
Something tells me your "Titties for Tracy Morgan" fundraiser won't pan out.
I fucked the midget version of a backstreet boy and I am not mad about it
Just found $31 in my desk drawer. In $1's. WTF happened last night?!
am i the only one who finds it a little awkward seeing as we all made out last night?
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